More musing from the stillness. Here I am still submerged in stillness, softness, and surrender. I am embracing fully that I am love. I am letting so many things that are not working about my life dissolve and fall away (sometimes gracefully and other times as humanly as one could expect – kicking and screaming of course). And I am realizing that I have a strong need to know.
Listen, I will not sit here and pretend I am not a class A control freak. I will not pretend that I don’t care about how things turn out. And at the same time, as everything I have always tried is no longer working the way it has all these years, it seems wise to stop moving. When in quicksand, the quickest way to avoid sinking is to stop moving.
Here’s the tricky part. A lot of us have been lead to believe that we need to have a plan, have our lives all figured out, and need to know where we are going. So over time we lose our ability to trust the Universe (or whatever your name for the bigger order of life is). What if we have been doing it all wrong all these years? What if its so much simpler than we ever thought possible?
All You Need To Know
In the end, I am realizing that the truth is the deepest part of us has always known. We come into this lifetime hardwired to live a life of meaning and purpose. And our incessant need for control takes us further and further away from what it is we came here to do.
Control is slippery, it comes in a number of formats that you might not recognize. Here’s a sampling of the common forms:
- Constantly staying busy
- Constantly taking care of others and pleasing others
- Always having a plan (also checklists, 100 things to do each day, a fear of too much downtime, etc.)
- Needing to know the outcome before starting down a path (aka fear of failure and disappointing others)
- Not following inner impulses and intuition because you don’t know where it leads
- Always trying to figure out your life and why you are the way you are
- Making sure to do things a certain “right” way
- Striving to be more and have more
- Can you imagine the immense freedom you would feel if you learned to trust that your deepest inner being was programmed to help you reach your destiny. Without fail?
Take a deep breath and really let that sink in. It’s the truth I am sitting with as I write today.
Trusting That All You Need To Know Is Here
In the past week, I have leaned into some pretty big wounds and pain patterns in my life. And at times it has felt like, “Are you kidding me?! This again?” Because I have been doing the work for 20 years now and I am about ready to be done with these yammering monkeys on my back. I know you feel me.
Here’s the difference. I am finally leaning all the way in to the pain and the wounds without needing a distraction. There is nothing easy about facing the truth. Distractions are readily available in our society for the express purpose of preventing us from reaching the greater truth.
I finally realize facing the truth is the path to freedom.
Your deepest longings, your greatest pains, and your biggest wounds are the lighthouse to your greatest gifts to this world. But you have to be willing to ride right into the eye of the storm with the darkness and pain while fully exploring the landscape. How many times have we heard, “The truth will set you free?” And how many times have we assumed we knew what that meant when in reality we were just paying lip service?
Your willingness to live through what you have in your lifetime has given you the exact gifts you need to touch the hearts of others. And a very deep part of you knew it all along. Time to sit back and cultivate your awareness of all the gold you have been mining through the darkest days.
All You Need To Know Is Already Inside You
If life is for you and your deepest self knows exactly what you are programmed to do in this lifetime, can you rest knowing it is all unfolding perfectly? This is the truth the stillness has created in me this week.
I am choosing to stop wriggling unnecessarily, to stop worrying about what’s next or how I will get there, and to stop asking what is wrong with me. None of these questions are helpful and yet, how many of us spend time asking these questions while demanding answers that we think should set us free? And in the end, we feel more confused, defeated, overwhelmed, and unable to trust.
If you have been to a water park, you know about the “lazy river” attractions. If not, the lazy river is designed so you can’t help but be pulled along gently by the moving water. Imagine aligning so fully with your deepest self, who already knows what your destiny is and exactly how to get you there, that you get to just float on the lazy river. Because when you stop moving and filling your life with busyness and a million forms of control, the deep natural order will take you to your deepest desires. Your satisfaction and fulfillment are 100% guaranteed.
Resources On The Journey To All You Need To Know
I am asking some different questions and using some different resources to navigate this time in my life. Here are a few that might really support you.
First, Kelly Canull is a soul coach who absolutely has a handle on navigating the deeper path and her podcast is changing my life. Check out her work here.
Second, my coach recommended a book that is revolutionizing the way I am thinking about my life. That book is titled Being You, Changing the World. It will teach you how to embrace fully who you truly are and stop looking outside yourself for answers.
Third, here’s a great article about surrendering the need for control called Let Go of Control.
in breath of creativityPlease leave a comment about how you are going to start living your life knowing that you already know all you need to know.
And if you would like the support of other women who are on the transformation journey to become vibrant. imaginative. unforgettable. join the Closeted Creatives Coaching Facebook group.