It’s okay not to cook. Free yourself from the kitchen and instead have a bowl of cereal, popcorn, or double fudge ripple ice cream. That should cover a few food groups!
It’s also okay not to be okay. Free yourself from the pressure of having to get it all together as quickly as possible. It took a long time to get where you are…struggling with divorce or its aftermath…and it will take time to recover. Please be patient.
You’ve worked diligently to protect yourself, your finances, your safety, and your children. You’ve had to deal with memories and may have wondered what you could have done differently. You may feel frustrated that you can’t “do” self-love, especially if you have that voice telling you that you are not worthy.
You’re doing your best to manage all of this when things feel as if they are falling apart. As much as people tell you that when things fall apart, they always come back together in a healthier, more beautiful way, you don’t want to hear it!
It’s okay if you can’t envision your future. Free yourself from that expectation. Possibly though, you could envision the next hour or tomorrow afternoon or Saturday morning. Would you like to curl up and read a book, or check out a local book club? Do you want to work in your garden or text a friend to meet for coffee? Is there something you enjoy that you haven’t done in a long time or something you have never done but would love to try?
If you don’t want to cook, aren’t ready to get it all together, and can’t imagine a new future…it really is okay.
It simply means it’s time for a large dose of self-compassion and acceptance. Know that when you are ready, you will begin getting it together one piece at a time, and envisioning your future one image at a time. Personally though, when it comes to cooking, I’m still content with a big bowl of popcorn!
BARB GREENBERG,
FOUNDER OF REDISCOVERING U,
SPEAKER, AND AN AWARD WINNER AUTHOR.
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