Divorced Moms: Overwhelmed Much?

Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could be overwhelmed by joy, beauty or kindness. More often, though, divorced mothers are overwhelmed by the pressures of work and children and the never ending list of errands and responsibilities. 

You may feel like you’re carrying boulders on your shoulders and be amazed that you can still stand up.

Well-meaning friends may say, “Take a break.” You want to respond, “Give me a break!”

You are told to totally devote yourself to your children, and at the same time you are told to be fully committed to your job. You desperately try to accomplish both. No wonder you are overwhelmed. 

Another message whispers that your parenting mistakes will damage your children. Geez! You are human. You are not supposed to be perfect, and you don’t want your children to feel that they have to be perfect either. Great kids, yes. Perfect, no.

Here are a few suggestions to ease your overwhelm. This is not a “to-do” list.  You don’t need another one of those!

*Be gentle with yourself, and remember the classics: eat well, sleep well, and exercise.

*Laugh in the shower daily for a few minutes. You will probably have to force it, but it will shift your perspective and strengthen your abs!

*Listen to inspirational audios or uplifting music in the car and at home.

*Create a Gratitude Jar. Take a glass or clear plastic jar (or vase). Get small (post-it size) pieces of colored paper. Each night before bed, write one thing you’re grateful for on each piece of paper. Fold the pieces of paper and put them into the jar, and the jar will slowly and beautifully fill with colored pieces of gratitude. It’s also a wonderful activity to do with your children.

*Create a Worry Box. Get your worries out of your head and write them on pieces of paper, adding them to your box as needed. At the end of each week go through them, possibly with a cup of tea or a bowl of ice cream!  You may be surprised by what has already resolved on it own or what had seemed to be so daunting has lost its intensity.

Then one day, sooner than you realize, you will, indeed, find yourself overwhelmed by joy and beauty and kindness.